"The worst kind of love is when you love- 2 AM Sunrise, by Ashe Vernon (via latenightcornerstore)
through the disgusting—
when you’re bad for each other
and you know it
and you keep on loving
and it tears you apart.
The worst is when you can’t get enough of it.
You’re running to their mouth
like you’re looking for a fix;
you promise yourself,
just one last time.
But the last time becomes the next time
and you wear their bruises
in a ring around your neck,
and tell yourself it’s poetic
to wear hickeys like a hanging.
You try to shake them from your bones,
but they’ve soaked into the marrow,
made sponges of your femurs.
Your legs give out at the knees
and you call it love.
They say the warning sign
is when you think you need one another.
They say that’s where it starts.
But you’ve never loved by halves
and you don’t know how to stop.
The worst is when you lose yourself loving
but you have always loved that way
and you don’t think there’s anything
you can do about it."
"1. When my mother was young, she met a boy with eyes like a storm cloud and lips like a hurricane. He washed over like a tidal wave and ruined everything he touched. She told me that there is always one person that will affect your life forever and after them, nothing will ever be quite the same. I know for me that person is going to be you. So I’m standing on the shore right now and the tides are starting to come back in. I know that I’ll probably drown in your cold depth, but all I want is to feel you against my skin.- 7 things I could of said to you instead of ignoring your message to me last night (via dumbdaisies)
2. I will never forget the day you called at 4 am begging to see me. I snuck out the back door and ran down the middle of the street into your arms. I should’ve ignored you and went back to sleep, but I didn’t just get to see the stars in the sky that night, I also got to see them forming in your eyes whenever you looked at me.
3. You have a sickness in you, that no doctor can prescribe medication for. It must have snuck through your lips, travelled down to my heart and rotted my fucking insides. You grew there like bacteria. I just want to scrub my heart clean of you then forget that you ever were in the deepest parts of me.
4. My dad chain smokes his cigarettes and has said vile words to me that I can still see stained onto my skin today. Maybe I give you too much credit. I suppose you weren’t actually the first boy to break my heart.
5. It’s been too long since you left to pretend that you’re ever going to come back. I just wish I could let myself play make believe a little longer, but I’m a big girl now and I have to stop partaking in your games and join the real world.
6. Yesterday I was in the car and I heard our song on the radio. I used to be annoyed when you’d try to mimic the chorus. But I’d take irritation over heart ache any day. Just come back and finish the verse. I wish I could hear your fucking voice.
7. I have this recurring dream where you show up on my doorstep and kiss me so hard that I can honestly taste your coffee breath while I sleep. You consume me in every way possible as it. Is it really necessary
to haunt my dreams too?"
"- my wish list (via extrasad)
1. Please let me in. I’ve broken all my fingers trying to claw my way into your head and I can’t touch anything without screaming. I guess I just want to make sure you’re okay. Maybe if I know what keeps you up at night I can help you sleep a little better.
2. Sleep next to me.
3. I swear to god you look at me and you see everything inside of me. I know you see the time I cut myself on an old razor I found under the sink and I couldn’t stop bleeding. I know you see all the times I cried so hard I threw up. I know you see the way my heart doesn’t really fit right in my chest and is always cracking a little. I know you see all the black and blue marks on my chest and I know you can see all the nights I woke up at 4 a.m. sweating and screaming. I hope you can see some of the good stuff too. Like how much I love you. I love you.
4. I want you here.
5. Don’t leave.
6. When you feel like you’re leaking and your breathing gets sharp and you feel your bones crumbling and you need to run away take me with you.
7. Be here.
8. Be here now.
9. and 74 years from now.
10. Take care of yourself because I’m not so sure I can live without you."
"- to the girl that gets to love you next // sad-disposition (via hefuckin)
1. please be gentle. rough hands and smoldering words from a life of hardship have already worn her down more than you’ll ever fully understand.
2. please be patient. some days you will open your eyes to start the day, and you won’t even recognize that girl you’re waking up next to. but i promise she’s still there. give her some time, she’ll come back to you eventually.
3. please be kind. she’ll scream at you that she can’t do this, that you’re going to leave like everyone else. she’ll yell hurtful thoughts at random just to test you, just to see if you’ll stay. but do not recuperate these spiteful words. grab her by the hands, look her in the eyes, and tell her you love her.
4. please be spontaneous. wake her up at 2 am and take her to the ocean. lay a blanket on the sand, light some candles, turn on her favorite song, and look at the stars. she’s always been a hopeless romantic.
5. please love her. i know it’ll be hard, because she’s stubborn, and difficult, and on some days she’ll make you want to pull all of your hair out. but for every day that’s hard, i promise she’ll give you a months worth of days that’ll make it all worth it. so stay, because you’re being given an opportunity that i thought i would have forever."